Life is happening FOR us, not TO us.

Ok, I’m going to go a little deep on ya compared to our typical fashion, food, or fitness filled blog post. I promised you at the New Year that I was going to elaborate on finding joy and happiness in posts to come- so this is my first one. I would love to know your thoughts and feelings…..

I would like to ask you a question, Are you happy?  I would assume that if you were able to answer my question, you would probably say, “Sure I’m happy”… although you would probably use some kind of qualifier such as…

But when this project is done at work, I will be happier…  or

When my kids get a little older and more independent, I will be even happier… or

When I own a home, get a better job, have better health, or have more money or when my spouse does this or that, I will definitely be happier than I am now.

The purpose of our existence is to have joy. Why can’t we have joy now and not qualify it when some future situation may or may not happen?

I have struggled with what I call “cheap happiness” – happiness that is based on whether or not something is going my way, or whether or not other people have or have not let me down, or things of that nature. So, that is why a year or so ago I decided to truly figure out what is happiness and make a choice in my life to live in a beautiful state instead of a suffering one- which is one that is any feeling or emotion that removes you from your happy state.

I once read, “The trick is to enjoy life.  Don’t wish away your days, waiting for better ones ahead.”  I think there is so much wisdom in that statement.  Things might now be perfect in our lives at this very moment but we can be joyful despite our trials.

So how do we do this?  Well, we can understand where happiness comes from.  Feeling happiness is a conscious choice we make for ourselves.  We must choose to be happy.

From one of my favorite guys, Tony Robbins, I will paraphrase : There are two states you can live in- a beautiful state or a suffering state. You are either progressing forward in that beautiful place or life, or you are moving backwards. There is no stationary. If you are not moving forward, you are moving backward. There’s a survival mechanism in our brains that is always looking for what is wrong. That is what it does. You can fight it or flight it. Our primitive brain was looking for survival- avoiding tigers and making fire- we don’t have that anymore so now it worries about what people think, or do I have enough money. The mind is always looking for what’s wrong; however, there is always right there too.

Happiness has almost nothing to do with our circumstances and everything to do with our attitude.There is an exception here and that is with those living in extreme poverty that do not have shelter or food or a way to fulfill their basic needs.  This group of people tends to benefit and actually become happier when those basic needs are met. How do we choose to be happy when we’re experiencing a trial or we suffer from depression?

I’ve noticed in my own life, when I’m depressed, I seem to turn inward.  I think that my suffering is someone else’s fault and they are the reason why I’m not happy.  I start to think that happiness can be found anywhere but the stage I’m in and I begin to feel sorry for myself.  I begin to be selfish and only think of my own needs and my own sorrow.  This is not a nice way to live.  I have seen members of my family wallow in this thinking their whole lives and shut everyone else out.  This thinking destroys their life and pushes their loved ones away. I’ve learned by watching them, this is not the way I want my life be.

Life is happening for us NOT TO us- it is our job to find out what the benefit is – if we do life can be magnificent.

My dress- sold out- but similar here : ivory coming soon

to be continued….

Anthro spring fashion show

I was able to attend the Anthro spring Fashion show at City Creek (Utah) last week. Margot (@houseofoleary) and I went together and were able to see some of the new pretty, bright spring looks they have in store right now! Bonus- it was International Women’s Day!

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Now, I wasn’t in the best spot to capture amazing pics- but lucky for me, Shauna with ‘chic over 50‘ was in the show (and a total babe!) and wrote an amazing post about it – plus took some great pics! (that’s her in the first pic, top left!)

Here are some of my current new anthro favs:

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1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15

happy shopping!

xox

aj

 

ootd highs and lows

Let me introduce you to probably my most worn top the past several months:

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top | jeans | backpack | shoes | sunglasses

This is the ‘Amelie’ top. I wore it in the hospital after having baby Rem, and I’ve worn it at least once a week since. I’m actually wearing it right now as I type this 🙂 I dress it up or down- boots or sneakers. It doesn’t matter. I have it in both colors – and I could not be a bigger fan. Ash has even worn it tucked in to a pencil skirt for an office chic look!

 

On a more personal note- Anyone else struggling to catch up right now? I am having the hardest time getting everything on my to-do list done these days, be present for my family and friends, take care of myself, etc! One thing I am making sure to do DAILY though, is my mindfulness meditation. I told myself I would be better about this at the beginning of the year-  So… despite me struggling, I at least feel like I am in a good space- which is all that matters- right?! 🙂

running update

ya…so…. remember my last running update? I sounded really motivated and was going to DOMINATE the training plan I had created. Well, to make a long story short. That DID NOT happen.

IMG_2947I have a million and one excuses as to why it didn’t- but I will spare you. I have, however, been running- but the longest I have run so far is probably 6 or so miles. I have been working on my speed and strength- and I have been really consistent on my weight lifting- so I haven’t been totally off the wagon. I have some amazing new workouts that I’m doing at home- just in my nasty unfinished basement- but I feel like they are working. Would you want me to share them!?

With hesitation I share my favorite workout clothes- only because I don’t want yall to buy them all up in my size 😉 : sports bras & long pants & top | colorful shorts

So- there’s my update. Nothing fun. Nothing exciting- but the truth. I am rededicating myself to running though- I have signed up for a half marathon to run with some friends in a few months so I now have a goal that isn’t moving! Wish me luck!

Maybe I can follow my original training plan- just slightly tweeked- starting now.. well actually, starting next week because I just got my touch up for my microblading (post on this to come!) and can’t sweat for 9 more days hah:

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happy running!

xox

aj

Giveaway time!

We have teamed up with some of my favorite shops for a fun giveaway! My little Rem is now 5 months old (where has the time gone?!) and I wanted to share some of my favorite places to shop for things for her- as well as things for me!

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my dress

Here’s a little bit about each shop:

Petite Coo: This cute shop was at a pop up shop we were involved in over Christmas. I met the owner and she is just as adorable and sweet as the clothes she designs! The outfits I have bought from her for Rem are by far some of my favorites that she has. She wears them ALL the time. They are cozy and cute.

Canyon Leaf: I found canyon leaf after looking for raw baltic amber jewelry. They then custom made anklets for myself and my two girls when I couldn’t find exactly what I was looking for. They took the time to make sure it was exactly what I was wanting and the perfect fit. My Hadley and I wear ours daily- never taking it off- Rem, wears hers when she is not sleeping.

Emeroo: I actually met the owner of this cute shop by chance. I needed some new bows for Rem before we went to Texas a few months ago- so I searched for local etsy shops- messaged her asking if she could have them in time and she got them done the next day and I picked them up so I could take them with me! We met again at the same pop up shop that I was doing over Christmas. She makes the cutest bows. Both of my girls love them.

Make sure you enter the giveaway on our instagram post and show these cute shops some LOVE!